Amelia Ryan: The Breast is Yet to Come

Victoria Wyatt

A personal and hilarious foray into the highly relatable rollercoaster ride of pregnancy and early parenthood.
Amelia Ryan: The Breast is Yet to Come

Amelia Ryan, the pint-sized punnet of laughs and princess of (in this case satirical) cabaret, is back on the road with her latest show, The Breast is yet to Come.

‘This is the most important pre and post-natal class you will ever attend,’ states Ryan, setting the tone of the evening immediately by crashing through the audience with baby stroller and nappy bag in tow.

The Princess of Parody has finally popped, and this is a personal foray into the highly relatable rollercoaster ride that defines pregnancy and early parenthood. The Breast is Yet to Come takes the audience on Ryan’s journey from being up the duff to up all night, explains her self-proclaimed ‘history of exposing her breasts in public,’ and finds more rhymes for the common contraction of female bits than you ever imagined possible.

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Ryan is bubbly, likable and looks like butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth, but melt it certainly does, as this is a lady who does not mince her words. No case of baby brain for Ryan, as popular songs we all know and love are turned into bitingly incisive odes to motherhood and babydom.

The Breast is Yet to Come is a cleverly written, fast paced romp through all the fundamentals of pregnancy and raising a baby, where if you listen carefully you will also learn the surprising fact of the exact song playing during the not so immaculate conception of said little babushka, Archie.

The Breast is Yet to Come is a show for mums, for those who want to be mums, or anyone who has a mum. Opening night was a surprisingly mixed audience of new mums, those about to pop and baby daddies young and old. There are enough fart jokes for the blokes to be thoroughly entertained, and abundant amounts of angelic singing to keep more prudish audience members consoled.

This is a beautifully crass – elegantly so, if that is possible – celebration of a uniquely feminine journey. Ryan may be sheathed in sequins but she is a self-proclaimed ‘farty lady’ who has recently had her internal organs reconfigured.

No stranger to Perth or Fringe World, having recently visited with Lady Liberty and Storm in a D Cup and currently starring in Livvy and Pete, the Songs of Olivia Newton John and Peter Allen in addition to this production, Ryan is sure to please both returning fans (of which there seem to be many) and those new to the genre.

Whatever gender, shape, size or age you are, you are guaranteed to leave this hilarious romp with a wide smile on your dial, a story for the family and fabulous songs spinning round your head for days to come.

4 ½ stars

Amelia Ryan: The Breast is Yet to Come
De Parel Spiegeltent (The Pleasure Garden)
8 – 11 February 2018
Fringe World

What the stars mean?
  • Five stars: Exceptional, unforgettable, a must see
  • Four and a half stars: Excellent, definitely worth seeing
  • Four stars: Accomplished and engrossing but not the best of its kind
  • Three and a half stars: Good, clever, well made, but not brilliant
  • Three stars: Solid, enjoyable, but unremarkable or flawed
  • Two and half stars: Neither good nor bad, just adequate
  • Two stars: Not without its moments, but ultimately unsuccessful
  • One star: Awful, to be avoided
  • Zero stars: Genuinely dreadful, bad on every level

About the author

Victoria has worked across the music/festival/theatre scenes in New York, London and Rome for the last 15 years. She is currently back in her hometown of Perth and can be found writing for Artshub, designing sets and interactive displays for children's/community events and stage/production managing around town.


Victoria has worked across the music/festival/theatre scenes in New York, London and Rome for the last 15 years. She is currently back in her hometown of Perth and can be found writing for Artshub, designing sets and interactive displays for children's/community events and stage/production managing around town.
Victoria has worked across the music/festival/theatre scenes in New York, London and Rome for the last 15 years. She is currently back in her hometown of Perth and can be found writing for Artshub, designing sets and interactive displays for children's/community events and stage/production managing around town.
Victoria has worked across the music/festival/theatre scenes in New York, London and Rome for the last 15 years. She is currently back in her hometown of Perth and can be found writing for Artshub, designing sets and interactive displays for children's/community events and stage/production managing around town.
Victoria has worked across the music/festival/theatre scenes in New York, London and Rome for the last 15 years. She is currently back in her hometown of Perth and can be found writing for Artshub, designing sets and interactive displays for children's/community events and stage/production managing around town.
Victoria has worked across the music/festival/theatre scenes in New York, London and Rome for the last 15 years. She is currently back in her hometown of Perth and can be found writing for Artshub, designing sets and interactive displays for children's/community events and stage/production managing around town.
Victoria has worked across the music/festival/theatre scenes in New York, London and Rome for the last 15 years. She is currently back in her hometown of Perth and can be found writing for Artshub, designing sets and interactive displays for children's/community events and stage/production managing around town.

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